Even when I’m a mess, I put on a dress because I’m a superwoman…

A little over year ago, every inch of space in my life was taken up with something to do, somewhere to be, someone to meet. I was pushing myself to impossible limits, believing that was what it meant to be a superwoman. But I was burned out, a robot joylessly going through the motions. I knew I had to change? – Alicia Keys, Glamour Magazine, November 2008

There are few, few things I keep these days. As I’ve gotten older, my need for order in public and private view has become something of an case of OCD. But, for the past four years, this article, written by Alicia Keys, has been posted on a bulletin board in my office. I’ve never been able to give it up.

As women, are lives are infinitely complex. We’re wives or significant others, we’re caretakers and givers, we’re business executives, we’re life coaches and life providers.

Let’s face it, it’s harder than playing both of the roles that Sara Jessica Parker did in I Don’t Know How She Does It and Sex and The City, and it’s a lot less glamorous.

• Decisions: Everyday, we’re faced with choices we feel that we have to make, right NOW – that overwhelm us, make us question ourselves…out of fear or the inability to believe in ourselves…

• Decisions: Those choices often leave us slaves to to social norms, our fears cripple us and prevent us from moving towards what we truly want in our lives because it goes against what society says we should be or what we should aspire to.

• Decisions: Sometimes going against the grain and saying, “No, I am important. I deserve what I desire,” is what we need to do, even if it scares us. And honestly, it’s our right.

I’ve been the superwoman that Keys spoke of, losing her ability to say no. It was dangerous place to be, almost losing myself. But I caught myself, reclaimed pieces of my soul that I’d let others take, reached out to a support network and avoided the disasters that many woman are too blind to see. In the past year, a lot of people have asked me how did that and how I do what I do today. My response:

My heart leads my actions, not my mind. The Bhagavad Gita states that “The mind acts like an enemy for those who do not control it.” Therefore, my heart rules my decisions and actions.

 I’ve learned to replace fear with courage. Courage to go new places, courage to change direction or walk a different path, and courage to move towards the things that I only get glimpses of in daydreams. When I saw I wanted to start to manifest, I kept moving towards it. I still am, seeing my daydreams become my reality little by little.

I believe that our heart knows what we need and where we need to go.  Your heart can’t want something that isn’t right for you. Your higher conscious, or true self, won’t allow it. If you can’t believe that, it’s your mind mucking up what your true self is telling you. – @Macala

I decided to become a new kind of superwoman, one that’s imperfect. One that’s led by her heart and who’s comfortable in her own skin. While she stands on her own, she’ll also lean on the people she needs most. I put the article away today, I no longer need it.

A friend is someone who looks out for you when you’ve forgotten how to look out for yourself. Let their love guide you. – Alicia Keys

Thank you to Ruth Staiman and Wendy Bendoni for being amazing women, true forces of nature and always providing light in the dark. I adore you both.